Friday Reflections

Things Shared Are Never Lost (on 16th/36th Anniversary)

Points to Ponder: We are never really happy until we try to brighten the lives of others - Helen Keller

Story Line: Friday Reflections Through The Years ( a few sample images from 713 posts)

Reflection: What began in August 1985 as the stories I would tell our children on weekly Friday Evening rides became an asset while launching an Out of the Box Thinking class in the year 2004 in Penang, Malaysia and Cavite, Philippines. Participants liked the different concepts that were explained through stories of people, places and experiences. Per their request, Friday Reflection on internet was officially launched on August 5, 2005. Thanks to all for your encouragement, ideas, feedback and support for past sixteen years. ❤️🌅

Images above represent the seven values of Friday Reflections. Some of these were shared by readers and featured in reflections through the years.

Seven Values Are: 1. Keep on Learning New Skills. 2. Assume Responsibility 3. People and Relationships 4. Flexibility 5. Take Risks 6. Passion 7. Performance and Results. 

*In times of rapid change, experience could be your worst enemy.

POINT TO PONDER

Our experiences define us but can also hold us to outdated beliefs and focusing on what can't work rather than what will. 

STORYLINE by Rajiv Shah

Slavomir Rawicz' “The Long Walk: The True Story of a Trek to Freedom” recounts Rawicz' incarceration by the Russian military in a Siberian POW  camp, and how he led six prisoners over 4,000 miles – through the unforgiving Siberian winter terrain, Gobi desert, Tibet, Himalayas, and India - to their freedom.

       During his early days in prison, Rawicz's first ally becomes  Khabarov, a man who has dreamed of escape ever since his incarceration, four years prior. He has studied the terrain, how to create a diversion, and what it will take to survive in the excruciating climate that surrounds the jail – nature proving to be the harshest prison of all.

       When a snow storm blows in and makes visibility low, Rawicz decides that it is the best time to escape. The blizzard will cloak their break from the prison and cover their tracks as they trek deep into the wilderness. They are set to go.

       Rawicz wakes his friend Khabarov and tells him it is time, that the conditions couldn't better for their escape. Khabarov balks. He goes through the scenario in his mind, as he has many times before, eventually counting all the ways their plan will fail, even though the opportunity of freedom is right in front of him.

       His years in prison, his dreams of escape, his research and experience come to a head in that pivotal moment, and Khabarov chooses not to go with his friend. He stays behind, fearful and convinced by his experiences that their plan will not work. He can't change and his experiences in the prison keep him from his freedom - a freedom that Rawicz and his six companions find.

REFLECTION

I came across the title for this reflection* while perusing the gift shop at the Getty Villa in Malibu. On a magnet was this little tidbit of wisdom from J. Paul Getty, and I've been thinking about it ever since.

       Around the world, we are on the brink of major change economically and socially. Change that has left our leaders in great upheaval and wondering the best course of action. Change that has forced us to reexamine how we choose to live.

       There are people that believe that the end is near. I believe that what is happening is not the end, but a new beginning, a shift in the way we live. We are being forced to change our daily habits. Does that mean we are close to the end?

          Not in my opinion. We are just having to learn a new way. Our experiences define us but can also hold us to outdated beliefs and focusing on what can't work rather than what will. Much like Rawicz and Khabarov in the story, our experiences can keep us from acknowledging the conditions currently in front of us. Often our experiences lead us to focus on the harsh realities rather than the possibilities for change and growth. Especially in today's climate, not taking any action and continuing to proceed in the same way is a prison unto itself.

 

*Title quoted from J. Paul Getty

Originally Published on May 13, 2016. Repeat due to relevance in current globdal enviornment of rapid change.

Posted at 09:58 PM in 4. Flexibility, 6. Take Risks, Books, Current Affairs | Permalink

 

POINT TO PONDER

Our experiences define us but can also hold us to outdated beliefs and focusing on what can't work rather than what will. 

STORYLINE by Rajiv Shah

Slavomir Rawicz' “The Long Walk: The True Story of a Trek to Freedom” recounts Rawicz' incarceration by the Russian military in a Siberian POW  camp, and how he led six prisoners over 4,000 miles – through the unforgiving Siberian winter terrain, Gobi desert, Tibet, Himalayas, and India - to their freedom.

       During his early days in prison, Rawicz's first ally becomes  Khabarov, a man who has dreamed of escape ever since his incarceration, four years prior. He has studied the terrain, how to create a diversion, and what it will take to survive in the excruciating climate that surrounds the jail – nature proving to be the harshest prison of all.

       When a snow storm blows in and makes visibility low, Rawicz decides that it is the best time to escape. The blizzard will cloak their break from the prison and cover their tracks as they trek deep into the wilderness. They are set to go.

       Rawicz wakes his friend Khabarov and tells him it is time, that the conditions couldn't better for their escape. Khabarov balks. He goes through the scenario in his mind, as he has many times before, eventually counting all the ways their plan will fail, even though the opportunity of freedom is right in front of him.

       His years in prison, his dreams of escape, his research and experience come to a head in that pivotal moment, and Khabarov chooses not to go with his friend. He stays behind, fearful and convinced by his experiences that their plan will not work. He can't change and his experiences in the prison keep him from his freedom - a freedom that Rawicz and his six companions find.

REFLECTION

I came across the title for this reflection* while perusing the gift shop at the Getty Villa in Malibu. On a magnet was this little tidbit of wisdom from J. Paul Getty, and I've been thinking about it ever since.

       Around the world, we are on the brink of major change economically and socially. Change that has left our leaders in great upheaval and wondering the best course of action. Change that has forced us to reexamine how we choose to live.

       There are people that believe that the end is near. I believe that what is happening is not the end, but a new beginning, a shift in the way we live. We are being forced to change our daily habits. Does that mean we are close to the end?

          Not in my opinion. We are just having to learn a new way. Our experiences define us but can also hold us to outdated beliefs and focusing on what can't work rather than what will. Much like Rawicz and Khabarov in the story, our experiences can keep us from acknowledging the conditions currently in front of us. Often our experiences lead us to focus on the harsh realities rather than the possibilities for change and growth. Especially in today's climate, not taking any action and continuing to proceed in the same way is a prison unto itself.

 

*Title quoted from J. Paul Getty

Originally Published on May 13, 2016. Repeat due to relevance in current globdal enviornment of rapid change.

POINT TO PONDER

Our experiences define us but can also hold us to outdated beliefs and focusing on what can't work rather than what will. 

STORYLINE by Rajiv Shah

Slavomir Rawicz' “The Long Walk: The True Story of a Trek to Freedom” recounts Rawicz' incarceration by the Russian military in a Siberian POW  camp, and how he led six prisoners over 4,000 miles – through the unforgiving Siberian winter terrain, Gobi desert, Tibet, Himalayas, and India - to their freedom.

       During his early days in prison, Rawicz's first ally becomes  Khabarov, a man who has dreamed of escape ever since his incarceration, four years prior. He has studied the terrain, how to create a diversion, and what it will take to survive in the excruciating climate that surrounds the jail – nature proving to be the harshest prison of all.

       When a snow storm blows in and makes visibility low, Rawicz decides that it is the best time to escape. The blizzard will cloak their break from the prison and cover their tracks as they trek deep into the wilderness. They are set to go.

       Rawicz wakes his friend Khabarov and tells him it is time, that the conditions couldn't better for their escape. Khabarov balks. He goes through the scenario in his mind, as he has many times before, eventually counting all the ways their plan will fail, even though the opportunity of freedom is right in front of him.

       His years in prison, his dreams of escape, his research and experience come to a head in that pivotal moment, and Khabarov chooses not to go with his friend. He stays behind, fearful and convinced by his experiences that their plan will not work. He can't change and his experiences in the prison keep him from his freedom - a freedom that Rawicz and his six companions find.

REFLECTION

I came across the title for this reflection* while perusing the gift shop at the Getty Villa in Malibu. On a magnet was this little tidbit of wisdom from J. Paul Getty, and I've been thinking about it ever since.

       Around the world, we are on the brink of major change economically and socially. Change that has left our leaders in great upheaval and wondering the best course of action. Change that has forced us to reexamine how we choose to live.

       There are people that believe that the end is near. I believe that what is happening is not the end, but a new beginning, a shift in the way we live. We are being forced to change our daily habits. Does that mean we are close to the end?

          Not in my opinion. We are just having to learn a new way. Our experiences define us but can also hold us to outdated beliefs and focusing on what can't work rather than what will. Much like Rawicz and Khabarov in the story, our experiences can keep us from acknowledging the conditions currently in front of us. Often our experiences lead us to focus on the harsh realities rather than the possibilities for change and growth. Especially in today's climate, not taking any action and continuing to proceed in the same way is a prison unto itself.

 

*Title quoted from J. Paul Getty

Originally Published on May 13, 2016. Repeat due to relevance in current globdal enviornment of rapid change.

Tough times do not last, but tough people do ...(My Lola-10 Years Later)

Point to Ponder: "Hope is a good thing, may be the best thing, and no good thing ever dies” - from the movie Shawshank Redemption

Storyline: Previously published on May 2011 under the title "Old Soldier never dies,he/she only fades away" - Repeat with an update on 10th Anniversary:

In these times of global health crisis, major political and regional conflicts, economic challenges and employment worries, I would like to share the remarkable life story of a "common" person that has been anything but common. Her friends and relatives affectionately call her “My Lola” (Grandma). I met her during my visit to Manila in 1978 and got to know her more during my expatriate assignment in the early '80s.  Here is her story:

She was born to a Chinese father and a Filipino mother. In her teenage years, she lost both parents and was left to take care of three younger siblings. In order to survive, she started a small business: she supported the family by selling fruits, vegetables & fish to locals in the market.

During the second world war, she learnt the language of the occupying enemy army, cut her hair short and dressed like a boy to survive. One day most of the people in her town were slaughtered by the occupying force before retreating. They didn't want to leave any trace for the American forces that were advancing towards her town to rescue the local people. She escaped death only because of the kindness of one enemy soldier. When Americans arrived, not knowing they were friends or enemies, she hide herself and came out only when one American soldier who had noticed her offered some chocolate.*

Seeing her struggles, a relative placed her in wealthy family as a housemaid. Her little earnings helped in taking care of her siblings. But her request to go to night school after day duties was denied. So she took it upon herself to study by listening to people, observing and inquiring whenever oportunities came up. In her early 20s, she got married and started another business that provided a comfortable, middle-class living for the next 30 years.

Sadly, in the mid '70s, a fire destroyed her home and her business. Before she could launch another venture, one of her teenage sons developed a rare disease and died, after long and very expensive medical treatment which drained the family savings. Most of the meals during that time were vegetables with soy sauce and rice. She would eat leftovers after everyone was done eating. A year later, another teenage son met with a vehicle accident and died, when returning from work to earn for the family. One would think that this is enough misery for one person in one lifetime.

Unfortunately, in the early '80s, her eldest son (23 years old) and her husband died. She was left to support the three remaining young children by herself.  She learned to read and speak English while taking care of a young boy; she would make the little one read a book, and while moving her finger on every word, listen carefully and pick up the pronunciation.

Eventually she went abroad and for the next 27 years her life turned for the better. In December 2008, on her 77th birthday, I asked her for a formal interview. After recapturing many of her experiences, and her creative approaches for surviving and eventually thriving in life, I asked her the final question. “What kept you going on in life with all that has happened?”

“Hope” she answered. “I never gave up thinking that tomorrow will be better than today and kept on going. Every day was precious and I gave my best efforts.”

Personally I have not met anyone who has been through so much in one life time. But what she said in her final answer is what I witnessed every time I saw her. On one Sunday in 2009, I chatted with her about the massive global problems going on at that time.  She told me, “Trust me. Things will get better.”

This story was originally published in November 2008.  Shortly after, “My Lola” (Mrs. Lim) developed some major health issues. In next two and a half years, she defied five calls by specialists for her demise and showed remarkable recoveries each time, to the surprise of all. Her willpower was inspirational to all who were fortunate to witness it. But on early afternoon of May 5th, 2011 her body gave way. During her life she fought every adversity/battle hard, never gave up and came through. And her last battle was no different. She demonstrated in all conversations and actions that she was going to give every ounce of energy she had and not give up on her own.

As her care taker put it: “They leave the way they live.” 

Reflection: Some people and their stories leave lifelong memories and learnings. Through the years, there have been many Friday Reflections about such people and thier remarkable stories. Today, May 5th, is the 10th anniversary of My Lola leaving this earth. She left a legacy; her life story, determination, drive, strong work ethics and good moral values are carried on by her daughter, her roommate of 21 years (her grand daughter) and her grandson. Also she never forgot that enemy soldier who saved her life and also "American"* soldier who rescued her with chocolate. Later in life she would tell that story to her granddaughter's husband who is "American". I am incredibly fortunate to have met her in this journey and learned from her practical wisdom that was  incorporated in my work and personal life.

Remembering the words of the artist and author Flavia Weedn:

"Some people make the sky more beautiful to gaze upon. They stay in our lives for awhile, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same."

Title Line 'Tough Times do not last, tough people do'  is a quote by Robert H. Schuller

 

 

The Successful Man is Himself

POINT TO PONDER 

 

In all my years of coaching, I have never been successful using somebody else’s plays..  - Vince Lombardi

 

STORYLINE: Muhammad is not talking, The fight that Ali lost.

 

Muhammad Ali was set for his first fight against Leon Spinks, an unknown boxer who had only six major fights in his career. Leading up to the fight there were a few things Ali did not do that were part of his normal routines before fights. 

 

He did not prepare as hard but also noticeably was his silence before. In all fights before he was very vocal about opponents, making statements, poetries how he is going to humiliate the opponent. Basically he used to Psyche them out and Psyche him up mentally for the fights. This was also a key factor in his winning fights where he mentally screwed up opponents even before the fight. 

 

From what I had heard, he was advice to be modest before Spinks fight and he decided to stay complete silent when reporters would approach him for questions, refused interviews . He would turn away and walk away when microphones were put in front of him.

 

And you know what happened? He lost that fight against very junior and unknown fighter.

 

 

REFLECTION 

 

One cannot tell what exactly was going through Muhammad Ali's mind leading up to the fight. But what one can learn is that he deviated from what was typical to him as a fighter. That was enough to mean the difference between a win and a loss. The moral? Always fight your fight. 

Akshar(E): Thinking outside the box for Education, Environment and Empowerment.

   

The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.

Point to Ponder: Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has. – Margaret Mead

Story Line: For past month I was thinking of an appropriate story for this special week of Good Friday and Easter. As an old saying goes “Things come to you at a time when you need them the most to get to the next stage, but you must learn from those things first.”

Two weeks ago childhood friends shared information about Akshar, a foundation and the school in Assam, India that accepts plastics (bottles, bags..) as fees in exchange for practical education and also uses innovative approach to utilize child labor to eliminate child labor Child Labor. Many of these children would have otherwise been working as laborers to earn living for their families and they would have never gotten an opportunity to go to school. It was fascinating to see out of the box approach for three Rs’ (Reduce,Reuse,Recycle) in all aspects of their operations.

Last week I had a good fortune to attend a short talk by the founder of Akshar, Dr. Alaka Sharma who has dedicated her life in the service of poor people and indigenous tribes in North East India. At the age of 22, she left her home in Mumbai to help people in the faraway land. In 2014, together with her daughter and son in law they started this school that has created a paradigm shift in education. Vision: Teach them how to save the world.

Instead of writing details of their approach and results here, I would like to share comprehensive and inspiring information about this organization that is already presented well in the website.

I believe their story of service to people in need is timely and appropriate to review and reflect for this special week. 

Mission, Objectives and Key Results

https://www.aksharfoundation.org/

Accountability: Also please look at their annual reports in the following section:

https://www.aksharfoundation.org/media

Reflection: In the past 16 years of over 700 posts, there are just a few stories that have classified under all seven values of Friday Reflections. This is one of those rare stories that is true to FR motto: Things that are given away are never lost and all seven values; Passion, Assume Responsibility, Keep on Learning New Skills, People and Relationships, Flexibility and Performance and Results.

In the words of Mother Teresa “At the end of life we will not be judged by how many diplomas we have received, how much money we have made, how many great things we have done. We will be judged by “I was hungry, and you gave me something to eat, I was naked and you clothed me. I was homeless, and you took me in.”  

Happy Easter to Friends around the World

Swimming Across. A remarkable journey: Andris Grof to Andrew Grove (Part 1 of 2)

“I am asked sometimes what I would like to be remembered for. My answer is always the same. I would like to be remembered for helping to build an organization that sustains itself long after my tenure.”  Andy Grove, 2004 annual report, his last as the chairman of Intel.

A lot has been written and known about Andrew Grove “the man whose microchips have changed the world and its economy”.  But the way to know more about Andris Grof, the boy who grew up in Second World War Hungary before coming to America, is by……diving into the memory lane.

Friday Reflections for Out of Box Thinking Students: Thursday, May 12, 2005 9:33 PM
Subject: A remarkable journey: Andris Grof to Andrew Grove

 Notable Quotes: from Andrew Grove

“Joining Intel...was the second best decision, and the second best initiative I have undertaken in my life." He then said, "The first one...took place 10 years earlier when I met the young woman who was to become my wife."  Andy at recent Sales Marketing Conference

Fourth Grade: Once again, I got good grades without having to work hard. The only subject in which I was marked down was ‘Behaviour” The teacher’s commentary that accompanied me throughout school was “Andris is too lively.”  

“I didn’t generally have a lot of run-ins with my parents, but when did I misbehave, my parents were a united pair: my mother lectured and my father yelled.”

Point to Ponder for OBT Students: pay special attention to following: Andy’s books in order: Physics and Technology of Semiconductor Devices, High Output Management, One on One with Andy Grove, Only the Paranoid Survive and Swimming Across.

Story Line:  Swimming Across: A remarkable Journey from Andris Grof to Andrew Grove

One of the responses to April (2005) Reflection 'The other side of Andy Grove* stated  “This is a total tease….I wish I had more time to read. And now you have made me curious about reading this book (Swimming Across). Actually I am very curious about Andy. I have heard so many things about him and his influence on Intel culture. I am amazed that he has had a wife (ie a successful marriage) and children even with so much time dedicated to Intel. “

A lot has been written and known about Andrew Grove “the man whose microchips have changed the world and its economy”, the chief architect of Intel’s world prominence, the time magazine “Man of The Year”, the author of many books and the former professor at Berkeley and Stanford.

But the only way (that I know of) to know anything about Andris Grof, the boy who grew up in Second World War Hungary before coming to America, is by diving and taking laps in Swimming Across, his biography till he reached the shores of America. Written in a simple language, Andy candidly recounts many childhood memories; surviving scarlet fever, his imagination, teenage fantasies, life during two foreign occupations, his encounters with girls, his loving and united family, closeness with friends, many adventures (For others they would be called mischiefs but since we are talking about Andrew Grove, shall we call them adventures?), Hungarian uprising and the final journey to America. It is the story of courage, persistence, love, struggles and triumphs, and how they have shaped his life.

At a parent’s teacher conference during Andris secondary school year, Mr.Volesnski, the physics teacher, told the assembled parents “Life is like a big lake. All the boys get in the water at one end and start swimming. Not all of them will swim across. But one of them, I am sure, will. That one is Grof.”

And the book ends with Andy saying “As my teacher Volenski had predicted, I managed to swim across the lake-not without effort, not without setbacks, and with a great deal of help and encouragement from others. I am still swimming.”

As Andy takes his final laps (as an employee) in the lake Intel for remaining five days, we salute him with a poem from the author of his favorite childhood book, ‘The Jungle book’.

http://www.kiplingsociety.co.uk/poems_if.htm

Thanks for the great memories. Thanks for making a positive difference in many lives around the world. 

Reflection: Yesterday I attended a virtual event ‘Andy Grove Remembrance’; the fifth anniversary of his passing from this earth. Many people shared their memories including ones who had worked for him and interacted with him for over 50, 40, 30 years ago to his last day. It was so clear that Andy still lives (swimming) in the hearts and minds of these people after all these years.

It brought back many memories for me; including few reflections I had written about him and some memorable learning experiences from encounters with/about him. Today’s reflection is one of those memories that resurfaced. I had written that reflection especially for my OBT students to show the emotional and personal side of Andy. Their impression of Andy was a logical, technical, no-nonsense and hard driving left brain person. The progression of his books shows the entire spectrum of his balanced (left/right brain) personality. As one of the notes in the story line demonstrates, the students were very touched knowing about emotional side of Andy.

Two days after I had published that reflection I got the email from Andy: Thanks for the nice note.  How do these things help in your course?  a

 I called him and explained my thinking. He seemed satisfied. The call ended without any 'constructive confronation' and left a lifelong memory.

Part 2: Back to Basics 2: Conversation with Andy's former TA and successful Executive, plus Lessons from encounters with Andy.(to be published on Monday March 29^th)

Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere.

Point to Ponder: "Discovery consists of seeing what everybody has seen, and thinking differently." - Albert Szent-Gyorgyi

Story Line: Last two reflections (Resourcefulness , Success ) were about children and their unlimited imagination, creativity, resourcefulness and determination. Future reflections will continue to narrate more such stories of children; their imagination, demonstration of leadership, kindness, honesty and understanding of basics of life.

Reflection: My neighbor Zach and I were chatting about last two reflections. How the children in those stories made the best out of what was available to them; life gave them lemons, they made lemonade out of it.

Zach mentioned that in his business he notices that there are many talented people who are like those children in FR stories. With opportunities and exposure, they thrive and create marvelous things. Then there is another group of people who are fortunate to have resources, connections and knowledge but don’t take action for various reasons (stuck in a box); lack of motivation, inertia, ‘have already achieved goals’, ‘want to take it easy’ or fear of failure. His key point was that many people have so much juice (talent, experience) have/left in them that they can offer a lot more to this world. 

That conversation and the video in this reflection has left me in a very deep thought.

 

Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere.- Albert Einstein

 

Success does not discriminate: The Jewel in the Palace

Point to Ponder: "Champions (Winners) aren't made in gyms (conference rooms and class rooms). Champions are made from something they have deep inside them: A desire, a dream, a vision. They have to have last-minute stamina, they have to be a little faster, they have to have the skill and the will. But the will must be stronger than the skill." Muhammad Ali

Story Line (from 2006): The beauty of success is that it does not discriminate...and nor is it exclusively held for certain classes of people based on gender, race, social status, national origins or religions.

So during my last overseas visit, when I repeatedly heard about a Korean Mini Series "Jewel in the Palace", which has captivated 100s of millions of viewers of all kinds over South east Asia (From Manila to Malaysia, Seoul to Singapore and Taipei to Tokyo), my curiosity took over.

About 500 years ago, during the time of Chosun dynasty, Jang Geum, a poor eight year orphan girl from a lower class of society is brought to the King's palace to work as a court lady. "Jewel in the Palace" is a true story of Jan Geum's journey from the lowly court servant to the head of Royal Kitchen and ultimately she became the first woman to be the Royal Physician in charge of the king and awarded the title Dae (Great) Jang Geum.

What is even more fascinating are the characteristics of winners that she displays right from childhood as well as a demonstration of Out of the Box Thinking techniques (Focus, Challenge, Associate and Paradigm Shift) throughout her life in a highly beauracratic and hierarchical structure. She is not allowed in the school becuase of her low status but she peeks in the classrooms through windows and learns.

Winners in life have a definite purpose. There was never a winner who did not plan to win in advance and Jang Geum is no exception. In her first encounter with Palace Heads, the eight year old declares, “I want to be the head of the Royal Kitchen.” (Imagine a fresh graduate in his first meeting with VPs saying "I am here to become a COO or CFO". How would it go?). Winners are aware of the price they will have to pay and Jang Geum endures all kinds of (some very severe) punishments, hardships and discriminations throughout her life but stays on course.

She practices OBT ideas by closely observing things, recombining normal ingredients to create new dishes and medicines; which delights the royal family. But the ultimate is the example in Paradigm Shift where she uses acupuncture and surgery to heal a rabbit. It had never been done before and in the process she demonstrated the surgery was a viable option where traditional medicines were not effective.

And just like many Risk Takers, she goes in and falls out of grace with superiors and eventually becomes a prey of Palace politics and fired. She is sent to exile to a remote island. She makes the best out of the situation and learns about medicines and becomes a Physician. With fierce drive and determination, she finds a way back into the palace. Her resourcefulness, integrity and valued solutions are eventually noticed by the king himself and she becomes the first woman to be the Royal Physician of the king.

Reflection: I am sure it is clear to you by now why the story is titled “(The) Jewel in the Palace.” It is a powerful story from Korean history about the rise of a little girl from a meager background to the head Physician of the Palace. During my business trip in Asia I found out that Corporate Executives and  managers/engineers were hooked on this miniseries so upon return I spent 3 full weekends watching it. I realized that in the history of every culture there are stories like this that one can learn a lot from. Things that one can learn from such stories are normally taught in corporate leadership classes; one can just watch such movies and get real life lessons.

Theme song from the mini-series

 

 

The welfare of each is bound up with the welfare of all...

At Friday Reflections, we're thankful for all of our wonderful readers and the stories, comments and feedback you regularly share with us.  You make Friday Reflections what it is, and we appreciate it. Happy Thanksgiving to You and Your Family.

Point to Ponder: It's Not What You Gather, But What You Scatter That Tells What Kind Of Life You Have Lived.

Story Line: The welfare of each is bound up with the welfare of all...

There was a farmer who grew excellent quality wheat and every season he won the award for the best grown in his county. One year a reporter from the local newspaper interviewed the farmer and learned that each Spring the man shared his seed with his neighbors so that they too could plant it in their fields...

 

“How can you afford to share your best wheat seed with your neighbors when they are entering their crops in the competition with yours?" the reporter asked....

 

“Why that's very simple,” the farmer explained... "The wind picks up pollen from the developing wheat and carries it from field to field. If my neighbors grow inferior wheat, cross-pollination will steadily degrade the quality of all the wheat, including mine. If I am to grow good wheat, I must help my neighbors grow good wheat"...

The reporter realized how the farmer's explanation also applied to peoples' lives in the most fundamental way... Those who want to live meaningfully and well must help enrich the lives of others, for the value of a life is measured by the lives it touches. And those who choose to be happy must help others find happiness, for the welfare of each is bound up with the welfare of all...

 

The Original Sources for the quote in point to ponder and storyline unknown.

 

 

At Friday Reflections, we're thankful for all of our wonderful readers and the stories, comments and feedback you regularly share with us.  You make Friday Reflections what it is, and we appreciate it. Happy Thanksgiving to You and Your Family.

Point to Ponder: It's Not What You Gather, But What You Scatter That Tells What Kind Of Life You Have Lived.

Story Line: The welfare of each is bound up with the welfare of all...

There was a farmer who grew excellent quality wheat and every season he won the award for the best grown in his county. One year a reporter from the local newspaper interviewed the farmer and learned that each Spring the man shared his seed with his neighbors so that they too could plant it in their fields...

 

“How can you afford to share your best wheat seed with your neighbors when they are entering their crops in the competition with yours?" the reporter asked....

 

“Why that's very simple,” the farmer explained... "The wind picks up pollen from the developing wheat and carries it from field to field. If my neighbors grow inferior wheat, cross-pollination will steadily degrade the quality of all the wheat, including mine. If I am to grow good wheat, I must help my neighbors grow good wheat"...

The reporter realized how the farmer's explanation also applied to peoples' lives in the most fundamental way... Those who want to live meaningfully and well must help enrich the lives of others, for the value of a life is measured by the lives it touches. And those who choose to be happy must help others find happiness, for the welfare of each is bound up with the welfare of all...

 

The Original Sources for the quote in point to ponder and storyline unknown.

 

Penfriends - Half a Century Later

Points to Ponder: “The love of one’s country is a splendid thing. But why should love stop at the border?" -Pablo Casals (Spanish Cellist, Wrote music for UN Anthem for world peace, 1963 Presidential Medal of Freedom; b.1876-1973)

Story Line: On September 24, 1970, I saw an envelope in the mail box. It had exotic stamps on it that said Philippines, a place I had not heard of. It was from Luisa Go in Manila who had gotten my address from her best friend who was my cousin’s penfriend. I already had twelve penfriends in various countries but decided to make one more friend for the reasons mentioned in the Reflection section.

During childhood, Luisa had a fascination with Indian culture and people. I found out later that on the way home from high school, she would walk down a street full of shops owned by Indians who lived in Philippines. Filipinos called them “Bombay”. When she would reach home, her mother would tease her “Did you see your Bombay today?”

In 1969 she saw an American movie Maya which was about two teenage boys and Elephant in the jungles of India. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maya_(1966_film)). One of them was an American actor (Jay North) and the other was an Indian actor (Sajid Khan). She became a big fan of Sajid Khan. So when she learned that her best friend had a pen friend in India she asked her to find her one through her Indian penfriend. --and She became my 13th penfriend. 

That is how it all began fifty years ago. The rest of the story is in the reflection section that was shared on our 40th wedding anniversary two years ago. 

Reflection:  The Spy Who Loved Me During my years in elementary school, I developed an interest in collecting stamps. I heard that our neighbor was getting letters from Germany so every other week I would go to his window to check if he had received any letters, and ask if he had some stamps for me. After returning from one summer vacation, and expecting a ton of stamps, I went to his place only to find the windows shut. After a few more days with closed windows, I knocked on the main door of the house. The lady who was renting the room to him informed me that he had moved to Germany. Upon further investigation I found out that his “Penfriend” had come and they had gotten married and moved to Germany*. That was my first exposure to English word,"Penfriend.”

That experience added to my hobby of stamp collecting and I wanted to know more about other countries while improving my English. By the summer of 1970, I had Penfriends in twelve different countries.

So when my cousin Yogini informed me that she had given my address to a girl in Philippines who was looking for a friend in India, I was not very enthusiastic. All the other Penfriends I had selected were from countries where I could correctly pronounce the name. I had never heard about the country named “Fili Pines**”. Plus she was going to be No. 13. I also thought about having no more money to buy stamps to send letters. My cousin was persistent and informed me that the person she was recommending is the best friend of her penfriend Helen Tan in Philippines and I would be very happy. She also showed me the stamps from Fili Pines which were very attractive.

On September 24, 1970 I received the first letter from Luisa Go. The casual writing style, handwriting and the brief introduction was very appealing. And the stamps were beautiful. The only thing that seemed strange was she had used the word Penpal instead of Penfriend. But I accepted the new label considering that one purpose of having friends around the world was to learn new things.

Things started out well until in one of her subsequent letters, she mentioned that she had a Chinese heritage. Her father was born in China and had migrated to Philippines at an early age and her mother was half Chinese and half Filipino. The word “Chinese” raised a Red Flag on my side. In the early 60s India and China had a border war and after that the relationships between two countries were strained. When some people found out she was “Chinese” they gave me cautionary advice; be careful, Chinese are very smart and they might be trying to get a spy through Fili Pines. After some discussion with my parents about this I decided to take a chance and keep writing letters.

Over next five years, we exchanged many letters, stamps and sometimes coins as Bonus. She had great sense of humor and shared very interesting stories about places, movies and various things written on variety of papers in a very likeable style.

In 1974 I moved to California. After a string of coincidences, On August 2, 1978, I ended up in Philippines to meet her. Since we never thought we would ever meet in person, we had told each other enough secrets about ourselves leaving no need for confessions. So in my second visit there in September of the same year, we got engaged. During my third visit there on December 19, 1978, we exchanged vows “I Do” in front of the judge in Manila City Hall.

Reflection: The last forty years have enriched us with the great understanding of each other; for me, richness and diversity of Chinese and Filipino people; and for her, fascinating history and heritage of India and its people.

In August 1978, when I came out of the door of Manila International Airport for the first time, I saw two girls waiting outside. Instantly I recognized my Penpal. The very first thought that came to my mind was “Do I want to be with her for the rest of my life?” and my heart said “Yes”.
And Yes, through the years there have been some border conflicts (aka disagreements, dialogues), some intense, but not once over anything related to our countries, cultures or religions. Just excursions we would have had in any relationship even if the person was from our own culture. One ancient rule of warfare has been followed: Ceasefire before dark (and a goodnight hug).

In 14 years of Friday Reflections being in a public domain, I have never shared such very personal story. Thank You for allowing me to do so on the significant milestone in our journey; 40 years.

I will end with the words from a very first valentine card from my new life partner and former penpal (Year 1979.)

“You are life’s most precious gift to me, for the reasons even I can’t explain. I love you more and more every day.”

*in late 1980s we were able to track down that neighbor through common association. JayKrishna and Giesla came by our place during their visit to USA.

**We pronounced Philippines as Fili Pines in early days.