Friday Reflections

Success leaves clues

From Left to Right: Row 1: Photos of City Ong (aka CT) and Adventures of Gautam. Row 2: Art of Shubhada and Signature Smile of Xiomara

By Phoebe Pineda

Point to Ponder: Success leaves clues. Go figure out what someone who was successful did, and model it. Improve it, but learn their steps. They have knowledge – Tony Robbins

Storyline: Recently, we’ve spotlighted some people who exhibit extraordinary passion, creativity, and kindness despite maintaining busy work lives.  Looking at these remarkable stories, we’ve identified a few commonalities:

1. Childhood experiences: How people grow up is important in building the foundation for who they become as adults.  Shubhada grew up immersed in art and science; Xiomara lived in a social neighborhood where everyone knew each other; and Gautam spent his youth watching sunsets and exploring forests in the remote outskirts of Mysore, India. For CT, the youngest child with the big age gap with siblings, he exercised his imagination while playing alone.
2. Support and encouragement: Having a supportive environment and people who are invested in your well-being is key.  In addition to having parents who made sure he didn’t overwork himself, Gautam had a friend in high school who took him under her wing and helped him navigate the tumult of adolescence. Shubhada had very supportive parents. CT and Xiomara were deeply influenced by their mothers.
3. A turning point: Several of our subjects can pinpoint the moment they discovered their passion, whether by volunteering to take photos at a conference (CT) or borrowing money from their best friend to buy a train ticket to Nepal (Gautam).
4. Curiosity/risk-taking: Our subjects like to venture beyond the beaten path, driven by a desire to see the world in new and exciting ways.  Shubhada utilizes out-of-the-box thinking (OBT) in both her engineering career and her artwork; Gautam seeks out the roads less traveled as he explores new countries; and CT finds his camera lens drawn to everything from sunsets to animals to a drop of dew on a leaf.
5. Building a relationship between passion and profession: Just because your interests are diverse doesn’t mean lessons from one can’t be applied to the other.  Shubhada approaches both engineering and art with creativity and a methodical focus, and CT finds he’s at his most focused and ready to work after he’s spent some time taking photographs.
6. COVID as an opportunity: With the pandemic slowing life down, our subjects have embraced their passions.  CT documented life in his Malaysian neighborhood, Gautam and his family hit the road to Florida and Yosemite, Shubhada drew daily charcoal portraits of inspiring people, and Xiomara encouraged those around her to remain positive despite the circumstances. 
7. Love first: Though some make money from their passion, they do it primarily because they love it, and because they want to share the joy it brings them with the world.

Reflection: In Developing Talent in Young People, psychologist Benjamin Bloom identifies three key elements that are crucial to helping children discover and foster lifelong passions: exposure, support, and coaching.

My younger brother and I have been lucky enough to have parents willing to allow us to experience and experiment with different interests rather than limiting us to a rigid set of expectations.  As a family, we love to travel–and to eat–and over the years my brother and I have been exposed to all sorts of different places (and different types of food).  For my brother, a weekend is not complete if we haven’t hit the road–whether it’s a drive along the coast, a trip out to the new mochi donut shop, or even running errands at Costco.

Our parents have supported us in all our ventures as we tried new things: while neither of us took a liking to soccer, I enjoyed my ballet classes at the local rec center, and my brother is an avid runner.  Their support, both emotionally and financially, has enabled us to receive proper coaching in order to hone our skills, from my brother’s weekly cross-country practices to my continuing education in writing and literature at a university whose faculty are committed to helping their students develop their craft and grow as artists.

But you don’t have to be a young person to find your passion, to discover what excites you.  Expose yourself to new things, open yourself to new experiences.  Find a friend (or two–maybe more) to support and encourage you–and don’t be afraid to seek out a mentor!  You’re never too old–or too young–to find what you love.

Do What You Love

Live the Life You Imagined

The Path of Life

There is Art in Science and Science in Art

Originally from the SF Bay Area, Phoebe Pineda currently studies Writing and Literature at the University of California Santa Barbara's College of Creative Studies.  In addition to storytelling, she enjoys sunset-watching, road trips, and making art.

Anand and Phoebe first met at a Kid-to-Work Day over two decades ago. Once a week, they meet to discuss the various stories, experiences, memories, and lessons he's collected over the years. They approach each conversation from two different stages in life, one looking forward, the other looking back.

There is Art in Science, and There is Science in Art (Do What You Love - Part 3)

“If you’re having a good time in your own company, it’s a good sign that you’re happy and you enjoy what you do.” -Shubhada 

By Phoebe Pineda

Point to Ponder:  “Discovery consists of looking at the same thing as everyone else and thinking about it differently.” –Albert Szent-Györgyi

Storyline: From majestic landscapes to portraits of renowned historical figures, Shubhada Sahasrabudhe’s art captures beauty in all sorts of places.

An engineer by trade, working at one of the world’s largest tech companies, Shubhada grew up in two worlds: art and science.  “I lived in an engineering town that manufactured pumps, and my dad worked in research and development,” she says.  “But art was in the house all the time.  My dad did outstanding sketches and paintings, and we spent our evenings sitting side-by-side with him and watching him work, doing random art projects-Even his engineering drawings.”  Growing up close to the process of creation, both at the pump factory and at home, instilled a strong sense of curiosity in Shubhada–“We were told to always be curious, not to stop at what but to ask why”–as well as a strong creative drive: “There was this push to be original,” she says.  “My parents told me, ‘You have to create something that belongs to you.  You're not an artist or a scientist unless you have contributed.’”

With limited supplies around the house, Shubhada often spent her childhood drawing in dirt roads with a stick which interestingly and unknowingly connected her to sand as a medium which she used years later.  “It was like an unlimited canvas,” she says.  Though she now has access to more traditional mediums, such as oil and acrylic, she still enjoys working with less conventional materials.  “I’ve always been an experimentalist, so I always try a new technique–anything that stains with a pigment is my medium,” she says.  “If I finish my coffee and I have a little left at the bottom, I will use it.” Her sand art in particular has garnered much attention, including a guest appearance on the Nickelodeon show Ryan’s Mystery Playdate.

Despite coming up in a workplace culture where hobbies and leisure time were challenging, Shubhada takes both her engineering and artistic career equally seriously.  “I don’t think I’ve ever felt like art and science are distinct things,” she says.  “To me they are so blurry and so similar. Yes, there is more system to science, but you see both elements–system and random–in different ways.  When I begin a painting, I don’t start with the details: I do the big strokes first to get the basic form and values together, and that defines my painting.  That’s exactly how I think of engineering: whenever I look at a problem statement, I look at the broad strokes and ask myself, What am I trying to do?  Once I have those pieces, I know how to fill in the minor details.  Knowing the end point helps guide your next steps.” Science and engineering also played a major role in Shubhada’s sand art, from constructing the worktable (which Shubhada designed and built herself) to finding the right type of sand: “I went to twenty different beaches to get as many sand samples as possible,” she says.

Though balancing work and life can be challenging, Shubhada says making time to do what she loves is worth every minute.  “Painting for hours is meditative,” she explains.  “It’s the most neutral feeling you can have, which is so rare in this day and age: not happy, not sad, just neutral and satisfied.”  She’s made it a priority to share that feeling with others, whether it’s teaching three and a half hours of back-to-back weekly classes through her art academy or finishing and posting a charcoal portrait every day for 140 days during quarantine. Sketch a Day  “I tried to use my art to combat the negativity and sadness,” she says.  “If you’re having a good time in your own company, it’s a good sign that you’re happy and you enjoy what you do.”

*For her contributions in the field of science, Shubhada recently received an esteem award "Women Engineer of the Year"  by American Sociery of Mechanical Engineers. Being recognized in the areas of her profession as well passion demonstrates her commitment to excellence in whatever she takes up.*

Reflection: I’ve always envied creatives who work in math and science: my physics and bio major friends who draw, write, and paint, who can navigate these two seemingly opposing fields, one world as foreign to me as the other is familiar.  Talking with Shubhada gave me insight into that fluidity: it’s about having a certain mentality, an approach that combines order and creativity and, most of all, an eagerness to learn.

At the end of the day, though the work may be different, the processes are more similar than we think, and the ultimate goal is the same: both science and art attempt to make sense of how the world works.  Science tells its own kind of story, the histories of who we are and how we got here, how the world moves around us and how we move within it.  And art is its own kind of science, an ongoing process of trial and error and building on the ideas of those that came before you, expanding our view of the world, defining and redefining truth.

For Anand, the son of two artists, interviewing Shubhada brought back a lot of memories of his own childhood, and how drawing on those creative experiences influenced his approach to problem-solving, enabling him to look at things differently and formulate solutions.

Our community of readers consists of people with a variety of different passions.  Though these may seem different on the surface, all have similarities in terms of process and approach, and all have valuable lessons that can be applied to different contexts.  But most importantly, no matter your line of work, putting your heart, enthusiasm, and soul into your endeavors will help you succeed.

 You can support Shubhada’s work by visiting her  WEBSITE or following her on Facebook.

Attachments: Versatility of the artist.

 

 

 

*late addition paragraph by Anand*

Originally from the SF Bay Area, Phoebe Pineda currently studies Writing and Literature at the University of California Santa Barbara's College of Creative Studies.  In addition to storytelling, she enjoys sunset-watching, road trips, and making art.

Anand and Phoebe first met at a Kid-to-Work Day over two decades ago. Once a week, they meet to discuss the various stories, experiences, memories, and lessons he's collected over the years. They approach each conversation from two different stages in life, one looking forward, the other looking back.

Why do people take more pictures of sunsets than sunrises?

Majestic Sunsets around the world: 93 locations

By Phoebe Pineda

Points to Ponder : “As your day comes to a close, ask yourself whether you’ve done everything you set out to do or been the person you desire to be.” - Everyday Power.com

 Story Line: Why do people take more pictures of sunsets than sunrises?

Perhaps it’s because many of us (particularly those of us who are night owls) aren’t awake for the sunrise.  But maybe it’s that there’s something special about sunsets – about how no two sunsets are alike, each with its own combination of striking colors lending new life to deserts, cityscapes, and ocean waves.  Every sunset is as unique as the day it concludes, an opportunity to take a step back and reflect on what we learned.

In one of my last writing classes, our professor had us submit an essay reflecting on each of our writing assignments.  In each reflection, we looked back on our writing process and the decisions we made: how did we make our writing easier for a reader to approach?  What type of reader are we writing for?  What were some of the challenges we faced, and what aspects did we enjoy?  The goal of these reflection essays, according to my professor, was to track our progress as writers – to keep a log of how we approach different assignments and what we learn in doing so, which can be a very valuable tool for improvement.  They also serve as a way to validate our growth, providing something we can look back on and see where we were and how we might do things differently, or how trying something new for one essay became integrated into our approaches to other essays.  It can feel tedious picking our work apart, rehashing what we’ve already written instead of pursuing something new, but at the same time, looking back at something you’ve completed and meditating on it can feel refreshing.  You’ve already done the hard work, and now you can relax and really acknowledge the amount of hard work you’ve put in, and how it’s paid off.

Where sunrises serve as a command, or a call to action, sunsets offer catharsis.  It’s why we take so many walks at dusk on the beach, or spend so many evening car rides just peering out the window, watching the glass go from golden-orange to rosy lavender as night falls.  My family’s spent the past few New Year’s Eves chasing that final sunset, and it feels like a fitting conclusion, a way to stop, breathe, and say goodbye to the old year in all its highs and lows, all its joys and hardships.

We’ll head into 2022 anew, with visions for what we want to accomplish and how we want to get there.  But as we ride out the final hours of 2021, I encourage everyone to take a moment to sit back and watch the sky.

 

Countries: Botswana,Cambodia,CostaRica,Scotland/England,Fiji,Guatemala,Japan,Laos,New Zealand,Malaysia,Philippines,Samoa,India,Indonesia,Israel,Taiwan,Thailand,Tonga,USA,Zambia.

Contributors: Sunsets Around The World Video. 93 locations, 31 Photographers, 20 Countries, 5 Continents

Alankar Naik: North Carolina (182-193), Alka Pandya: Mumbai (115-116),Boon Seng Tan: Hillsoboro,OR and Pismo Beach,Ca (97,103,150), Chen Ping and Oliver Chen: California Coast and Yosemite(114, 143-144), Chet Thaker: Zambia and Bostwana (163-168,172-179*), City Ong: Penang, Malaysia (69-72,,89,99-100,104,108-109,113,124-135*,141-142,181), Gabriela Cruz Thompson: Costa Rica/Oregon (110-112),Gordon Ching: Ohau, Hawaii (117-119,121-123*,139-140),Haresh Parikh: Ahmedabad, India (203-207),Kalpana Shah Korvar:Poona, India (145-146*),Kashyap Shah:KeyWest,FL and Kannapali,Maui (170,180), Kevin Rockwood:Manila, Philippines(153),Madhuri Narkhede: Picacho Peak,AZ (136),Mayur Desai: SanDiego,Ca (161-162),Mihir Shah: San Francisco Bay, Pillar Point,Ca (154-55,202),Nitin Godiwla:Rhode Island (229), Phobe Pineda: Culver City,Ca (157), Rajan Shah:Mussorie and Coorg India (137-8,156), Rajiv Shah: San Francisco (105-106),Ronak Shodhan: Ahmedabad,India(228),Samantha Baud: Los Altos,Ca (171),Sharad Mehta: Amelia Island,FL(169),Sharvary Trivedi: Goa,India(67-68),Shashank Phadke: Moffet Field, Ca(158),Shinji Hioki:Oregon Coast(101-102),Swati Desai:Dwarka,Nasik,Abu,Goa-India, Bali(194-201),

Prasad Vepa:Montara(8),Carmel(9),BarHarbor(13),parque(22),PacificGrove(54),SantaCruz(55),Sunnyvale(56),Saratoga(147),Maui(148).

Gautam Singampalli: SanJose(160),GandCanyon,MonumentValley,Guatamala,Assam, AcreIsland-Israel,Jerusalem,LaguanaBeach-Ca, Outrey-Colorado,Amritsar,Ladakh,Yousemite,MountShasta,HalfMoonBay,MountWhitney and Mahabalipuram(208-227).

AnandLuisa Shah: Goa(1-4),Kauai(5-7),BryceCanyon(10-11),YellowStone(12),Christchurch,FranJoseph-NZ(14-15),VitiLevu-Fiji(16-21),SiemReap-Cambodia(23-25),LuangPrabang-Laos(26),Zion(27),DeathValley(28-29),Sunnyvale(30,98),Milpitas(31-2),Pascadero(33),Bali,Indonesia(34-37),SanLuisObispo(38),KingCity(39),LosAltos(40,96,107),Upolu-Samoa(41-47),Savaii-Samoa(48-50),Haapai-Tongatapu-Tonga(51-53),Glasgow-IsleofSkye-Scotland(58-61),HalfMoonBay(62-63),Seattle(64-65),SantaClara(66),ChianMai-Thailand(73),Bohol-Philippines(74-76),ElNido&Coron-Palawan(77-86),Okinawa-Japan(87),Alishan-Taiwan(88,90-94) and MountainView,Ca(151-152)

Unknown(95,120)…

*Few Photos of Moon.

Originally from the SF Bay Area, Phoebe Pineda currently studies Writing and Literature at the University of California Santa Barbara's College of Creative Studies.  In addition to storytelling, she enjoys sunset-watching, road trips, and making art.

Anand and Phoebe first met at a Kid-to-Work Day over two decades ago. Once a week, they meet to discuss the various stories, experiences, memories, and lessons he's collected over the years. They approach each conversation from two different stages in life, one looking forward, the other looking back.

You Don’t Get a Second Chance to Make a First Impression

By Phoebe Pineda

Point to ponder: “Two things remain irretrievable: time and a first impression.” --Cynthia Ozick

Author’s note: Anand and I met at a Kid-to-Work Day nearly two decades ago.  He was my dad’s boss, and when he wasn’t letting me doodle on his whiteboard while he and my dad talked shop, we were having conversations about books I’d read, or trips he’d taken.  Anand and I bonded over a shared love of stories, but where my knowledge came mostly from books, his came from years of experience -- talking to people, traveling the world, making mistakes.

My dad incorporated Friday Reflections into our nightly reading routine, which I admired then for its mixture of fun anecdotes from history and life and admire now for the lessons imbued in each chapter.  Years after those initial bedtime readings, Anand enlisted me to help him bring more of these reflections to life.  In our own reenactment of Tuesdays with Morrie, we meet once a week on Zoom, where he tells me a story and I shape it, much like a gardener pruning a tree.  We approach each conversation from two very different stages in life, one of us looking forward, the other looking back.

In the life cycle of every experience at an organization -- be it school, the workplace, or even a club or Scouting troop -- there are two important endpoints: the time you join, and the time you leave.  Today I’ll be sharing Anand’s thoughts on first impressions, and how to make them count.

Storyline: Early in his career, Anand was sent overseas to manage product engineering and quality operations in Manila.  Despite being technically competent, he lacked the maturity to interact with management -- he knew all the written rules, but not the unwritten ones.

As Anand completed his assignment, a more experienced colleague named Vic provided him with some advice for making a good first impression: When you join a new group or organization, don’t start making big changes right away.  Take the time to observe and get to know your environment -- you’re a newcomer, in an ecosystem with its own way of functioning.  Really gain an understanding of the culture and the relationships between people: who works with who?  What is most important to the organization, particularly to those in charge?  Just as you need to understand the geography of the landscape in order to build a road, you need to understand how your organization works in order to get things done.

By observing his environment, Anand discovered more crucial aspects of making first impressions.  First, don’t talk too much about your past job or previous company -- that’s history.  Success in a new environment depends on being able to adapt to that environment.  Instead of fixating on your previous experiences, spend more time getting to know the people you’ll be working with.  Ask them about what they do, what their priorities are, what excites them -- they’ll know that you’re present and interested in them.

Once you’ve gotten a sense of how the group works, you can start to bring in suggestions from what you’ve learned from previous experiences if you observe any areas that could use improvement, without bringing up the name of your previous organization -- but don’t try to force them.

These lessons became very important to Anand throughout his career.

Reflection: All of us have entered a new environment -- college, the workforce, a club or organization.  Adjusting can be difficult, especially when you’re the sole newcomer in a sea of experienced people who all know each other and have certain habits and routines.  But if you observe and pay attention, like a scientist studying an animal habitat, you can learn something new.

If you transfer to a new university for creative writing, but all you do is compare it to the writing program at your old school, people will wonder why you left in the first place.  Instead, get to know the faculty and your classmates--what drew them to the program, what genres and topics they write, what they’ve learned and what they still want to know.  You don’t have to abandon your old ways entirely, but learning the new ways will make your experience much easier.

Next week, we’ll discuss the importance of leaving lasting memories.

Originally from the SF Bay Area, Phoebe Pineda currently studies Writing and Literature at the University of California Santa Barbara's College of Creative Studies.  In addition to storytelling, she enjoys sunset-watching, road trips, and making art.

Things Shared Are Never Lost (on 16th/36th Anniversary)

Points to Ponder: We are never really happy until we try to brighten the lives of others - Helen Keller

Story Line: Friday Reflections Through The Years ( a few sample images from 713 posts)

Reflection: What began in August 1985 as the stories I would tell our children on weekly Friday Evening rides became an asset while launching an Out of the Box Thinking class in the year 2004 in Penang, Malaysia and Cavite, Philippines. Participants liked the different concepts that were explained through stories of people, places and experiences. Per their request, Friday Reflection on internet was officially launched on August 5, 2005. Thanks to all for your encouragement, ideas, feedback and support for past sixteen years. ❤️🌅

Images above represent the seven values of Friday Reflections. Some of these were shared by readers and featured in reflections through the years.

Seven Values Are: 1. Keep on Learning New Skills. 2. Assume Responsibility 3. People and Relationships 4. Flexibility 5. Take Risks 6. Passion 7. Performance and Results. 

Dance like no one is watching (for some lighter moments)

Points to Ponder: “Dance like no one is watching. Sing like no one is listening. Love like you’ve never been hurt. And live like it’s heaven on earth.” – Mark Twain

Story Line:  July 16^th is the birth anniversary of someone I know from the day I was born. It is also birthday of three wonderful people I met through my various work assignments. Happy Birthday.

The person I know from childhood taught me many good lessons through mentoring, coaching and care. Over past 16 years, I have shared those lessons in Friday Reflections. Not so well versed in Science and  other school subjects, He (my father) along with my mother spent considerable time giving me exposure to three areas they considered as very valuable for life; Reading, Sports and Theater.

When it came to theater, I was nervous at first, afraid that I may look silly or foolish in front of the audience and they would laugh at me. To that he would say “If you can make people laugh with your silliness and make them happy; You did good.” He emphasized that too much thinking would cause nervousness. He taught me how to perform (sing, act, dance) impromptu to gain confidence. His encouraging words were “Dance like no one is watching. Sing like no one is listening. Love like you’ve never been hurt. And live like it’s heaven on earth.”

Reflection: Today, I like to share how I have incorporated some of his learnings in my life. A break from normal FR subjects to have some lighter moments. Each video is a few seconds from longer events.

Dance like no one is watching: Penang, Malaysia in 2005. Intel Materials Group World Wide Summit.

Sing like no one is listening: Suva, Fiji in 2015

Love like you’ve never been hurt:Campbell, California in 2011.Dinner after our staff meeting. Caution: handle with care. you may never have been hurt before but after this activity you might.

Live like it is heaven on earth. An Evening in Okinawa, Japan, 2020. In Okinawan Cuisine. Snapshots from a long evening of dancing.

And It’s gotta come from the heart if you want it to work*: In the streets of Busan, Korea in 2013. Celebration of the United Nations Day Anniversary on the beachfront road.

I hope my father would be proud of my impromptu adventures. Happy 94th Birth Anniversary. 

*This line from a song “Come from my heart” by Susanna Clark and Richard Leigh.

Find the best person for the job, the second best is too expensive.*

"Good employees/workers are hard to find. So I did everything possible to keep them. Looking for new ones (unknowns) is like betting in Las Vegas.” Joe Z my former boss

Story Line: About two years ago, we needed some work done in our home. A good friend recommended a guy. Listening to his clear explanations about the things he was working on and observing how he conducted work, we were impressed. After work was completed with precision, he cleaned up not only work area but surrounding space too, rolled and tied loose items like nets and hoses that were scattered in the garden area and removed invasive plants; none of which were any part of the job he was asked to do. After that he asked us if there is anything else that he could do. That raised our curiosity about this person.

The next time he came to our place, we asked him to join us for breakfast before starting his work. During our chat, we discovered that in his 20s and 30s, he had spent many years in Saipan and learnt many skills. He had passion for technical (electrical, mechanical) subjects and loved to build and fix items. He also owned many pigeons and trained them for racing. We learnt how much care he took in preparing organic food for his flock. We appreciated clarity of his thought process in everything he described and thoroughly enjoyed the conversation.

Our dog, Zena Doolittle, also seemed to like him a lot. So when we were going to be out of town, he offered to take care of her. When Zena returned, she was well groomed and her water and food containers were shiny like brand new ones.

Over last two years, he has demonstrated his versatility and commitment to excellence in many projects; with each one executed flawlessly. But what about the value for dependability, reliability, integrity and trustworthiness?

Reflection:

Work was what we needed done in our home but what we got as bonus was learning about his values, high work ethics, attitude towards life and good family friendship. Every time he comes, first 15 minutes before start of work are spent on chismis (chit chat) and last 45 minutes of the day on shoot the breeze session about various aspects of life over mirianda (snack and drink)

 He was from a small town in Pampanga, Philippines. His father passed away early. He wanted to be an engineer and got admission in University. But he was sent off to Saipan to work. So he learnt different skills and gained experience by doing different jobs; with utility industry, airlines and others. Eventhough he could not get a degree he wanted, he demonstrates high level of education.

 

*My father used to tell me this quote that he believed was from Senior Rockefeller. Following that message had served them well. I too have been fortunate in my life to follow and benefit immensely from those words of wisdom.

Thanks to Prasadbhai Vepa for sharing: Your Work is Your Signature Quote.

Tough times do not last, but tough people do ...(My Lola-10 Years Later)

Point to Ponder: "Hope is a good thing, may be the best thing, and no good thing ever dies” - from the movie Shawshank Redemption

Storyline: Previously published on May 2011 under the title "Old Soldier never dies,he/she only fades away" - Repeat with an update on 10th Anniversary:

In these times of global health crisis, major political and regional conflicts, economic challenges and employment worries, I would like to share the remarkable life story of a "common" person that has been anything but common. Her friends and relatives affectionately call her “My Lola” (Grandma). I met her during my visit to Manila in 1978 and got to know her more during my expatriate assignment in the early '80s.  Here is her story:

She was born to a Chinese father and a Filipino mother. In her teenage years, she lost both parents and was left to take care of three younger siblings. In order to survive, she started a small business: she supported the family by selling fruits, vegetables & fish to locals in the market.

During the second world war, she learnt the language of the occupying enemy army, cut her hair short and dressed like a boy to survive. One day most of the people in her town were slaughtered by the occupying force before retreating. They didn't want to leave any trace for the American forces that were advancing towards her town to rescue the local people. She escaped death only because of the kindness of one enemy soldier. When Americans arrived, not knowing they were friends or enemies, she hide herself and came out only when one American soldier who had noticed her offered some chocolate.*

Seeing her struggles, a relative placed her in wealthy family as a housemaid. Her little earnings helped in taking care of her siblings. But her request to go to night school after day duties was denied. So she took it upon herself to study by listening to people, observing and inquiring whenever oportunities came up. In her early 20s, she got married and started another business that provided a comfortable, middle-class living for the next 30 years.

Sadly, in the mid '70s, a fire destroyed her home and her business. Before she could launch another venture, one of her teenage sons developed a rare disease and died, after long and very expensive medical treatment which drained the family savings. Most of the meals during that time were vegetables with soy sauce and rice. She would eat leftovers after everyone was done eating. A year later, another teenage son met with a vehicle accident and died, when returning from work to earn for the family. One would think that this is enough misery for one person in one lifetime.

Unfortunately, in the early '80s, her eldest son (23 years old) and her husband died. She was left to support the three remaining young children by herself.  She learned to read and speak English while taking care of a young boy; she would make the little one read a book, and while moving her finger on every word, listen carefully and pick up the pronunciation.

Eventually she went abroad and for the next 27 years her life turned for the better. In December 2008, on her 77th birthday, I asked her for a formal interview. After recapturing many of her experiences, and her creative approaches for surviving and eventually thriving in life, I asked her the final question. “What kept you going on in life with all that has happened?”

“Hope” she answered. “I never gave up thinking that tomorrow will be better than today and kept on going. Every day was precious and I gave my best efforts.”

Personally I have not met anyone who has been through so much in one life time. But what she said in her final answer is what I witnessed every time I saw her. On one Sunday in 2009, I chatted with her about the massive global problems going on at that time.  She told me, “Trust me. Things will get better.”

This story was originally published in November 2008.  Shortly after, “My Lola” (Mrs. Lim) developed some major health issues. In next two and a half years, she defied five calls by specialists for her demise and showed remarkable recoveries each time, to the surprise of all. Her willpower was inspirational to all who were fortunate to witness it. But on early afternoon of May 5th, 2011 her body gave way. During her life she fought every adversity/battle hard, never gave up and came through. And her last battle was no different. She demonstrated in all conversations and actions that she was going to give every ounce of energy she had and not give up on her own.

As her care taker put it: “They leave the way they live.” 

Reflection: Some people and their stories leave lifelong memories and learnings. Through the years, there have been many Friday Reflections about such people and thier remarkable stories. Today, May 5th, is the 10th anniversary of My Lola leaving this earth. She left a legacy; her life story, determination, drive, strong work ethics and good moral values are carried on by her daughter, her roommate of 21 years (her grand daughter) and her grandson. Also she never forgot that enemy soldier who saved her life and also "American"* soldier who rescued her with chocolate. Later in life she would tell that story to her granddaughter's husband who is "American". I am incredibly fortunate to have met her in this journey and learned from her practical wisdom that was  incorporated in my work and personal life.

Remembering the words of the artist and author Flavia Weedn:

"Some people make the sky more beautiful to gaze upon. They stay in our lives for awhile, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same."

Title Line 'Tough Times do not last, tough people do'  is a quote by Robert H. Schuller

 

 

Akshar(E): Thinking outside the box for Education, Environment and Empowerment.

   

The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.

Point to Ponder: Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has. – Margaret Mead

Story Line: For past month I was thinking of an appropriate story for this special week of Good Friday and Easter. As an old saying goes “Things come to you at a time when you need them the most to get to the next stage, but you must learn from those things first.”

Two weeks ago childhood friends shared information about Akshar, a foundation and the school in Assam, India that accepts plastics (bottles, bags..) as fees in exchange for practical education and also uses innovative approach to utilize child labor to eliminate child labor Child Labor. Many of these children would have otherwise been working as laborers to earn living for their families and they would have never gotten an opportunity to go to school. It was fascinating to see out of the box approach for three Rs’ (Reduce,Reuse,Recycle) in all aspects of their operations.

Last week I had a good fortune to attend a short talk by the founder of Akshar, Dr. Alaka Sharma who has dedicated her life in the service of poor people and indigenous tribes in North East India. At the age of 22, she left her home in Mumbai to help people in the faraway land. In 2014, together with her daughter and son in law they started this school that has created a paradigm shift in education. Vision: Teach them how to save the world.

Instead of writing details of their approach and results here, I would like to share comprehensive and inspiring information about this organization that is already presented well in the website.

I believe their story of service to people in need is timely and appropriate to review and reflect for this special week. 

Mission, Objectives and Key Results

https://www.aksharfoundation.org/

Accountability: Also please look at their annual reports in the following section:

https://www.aksharfoundation.org/media

Reflection: In the past 16 years of over 700 posts, there are just a few stories that have classified under all seven values of Friday Reflections. This is one of those rare stories that is true to FR motto: Things that are given away are never lost and all seven values; Passion, Assume Responsibility, Keep on Learning New Skills, People and Relationships, Flexibility and Performance and Results.

In the words of Mother Teresa “At the end of life we will not be judged by how many diplomas we have received, how much money we have made, how many great things we have done. We will be judged by “I was hungry, and you gave me something to eat, I was naked and you clothed me. I was homeless, and you took me in.”  

Happy Easter to Friends around the World

Success does not discriminate: The Jewel in the Palace

Point to Ponder: "Champions (Winners) aren't made in gyms (conference rooms and class rooms). Champions are made from something they have deep inside them: A desire, a dream, a vision. They have to have last-minute stamina, they have to be a little faster, they have to have the skill and the will. But the will must be stronger than the skill." Muhammad Ali

Story Line (from 2006): The beauty of success is that it does not discriminate...and nor is it exclusively held for certain classes of people based on gender, race, social status, national origins or religions.

So during my last overseas visit, when I repeatedly heard about a Korean Mini Series "Jewel in the Palace", which has captivated 100s of millions of viewers of all kinds over South east Asia (From Manila to Malaysia, Seoul to Singapore and Taipei to Tokyo), my curiosity took over.

About 500 years ago, during the time of Chosun dynasty, Jang Geum, a poor eight year orphan girl from a lower class of society is brought to the King's palace to work as a court lady. "Jewel in the Palace" is a true story of Jan Geum's journey from the lowly court servant to the head of Royal Kitchen and ultimately she became the first woman to be the Royal Physician in charge of the king and awarded the title Dae (Great) Jang Geum.

What is even more fascinating are the characteristics of winners that she displays right from childhood as well as a demonstration of Out of the Box Thinking techniques (Focus, Challenge, Associate and Paradigm Shift) throughout her life in a highly beauracratic and hierarchical structure. She is not allowed in the school becuase of her low status but she peeks in the classrooms through windows and learns.

Winners in life have a definite purpose. There was never a winner who did not plan to win in advance and Jang Geum is no exception. In her first encounter with Palace Heads, the eight year old declares, “I want to be the head of the Royal Kitchen.” (Imagine a fresh graduate in his first meeting with VPs saying "I am here to become a COO or CFO". How would it go?). Winners are aware of the price they will have to pay and Jang Geum endures all kinds of (some very severe) punishments, hardships and discriminations throughout her life but stays on course.

She practices OBT ideas by closely observing things, recombining normal ingredients to create new dishes and medicines; which delights the royal family. But the ultimate is the example in Paradigm Shift where she uses acupuncture and surgery to heal a rabbit. It had never been done before and in the process she demonstrated the surgery was a viable option where traditional medicines were not effective.

And just like many Risk Takers, she goes in and falls out of grace with superiors and eventually becomes a prey of Palace politics and fired. She is sent to exile to a remote island. She makes the best out of the situation and learns about medicines and becomes a Physician. With fierce drive and determination, she finds a way back into the palace. Her resourcefulness, integrity and valued solutions are eventually noticed by the king himself and she becomes the first woman to be the Royal Physician of the king.

Reflection: I am sure it is clear to you by now why the story is titled “(The) Jewel in the Palace.” It is a powerful story from Korean history about the rise of a little girl from a meager background to the head Physician of the Palace. During my business trip in Asia I found out that Corporate Executives and  managers/engineers were hooked on this miniseries so upon return I spent 3 full weekends watching it. I realized that in the history of every culture there are stories like this that one can learn a lot from. Things that one can learn from such stories are normally taught in corporate leadership classes; one can just watch such movies and get real life lessons.

Theme song from the mini-series