POINT TO PONDER
"Abundance is a process of letting go; that which is empty can receive."
Bryant H. McGill
STORY LINE by Rajiv Shah
Many of you that know me have known that I have dedicated my life for the last decade to the arts and making films. I've lived by the skin of my teeth at times, totally unsure of how things would work out.
Years ago, in 2005 to be exact, I began writing a film that was very personal to me. I wrote as a vehicle to act in the leading role of a film I was truly passionate about. I wasn't being given the opportunity I desired, so I decided to stop waiting and created the project for myself. I never fashioned myself a writer, it was more of an end to my achieving my acting goals. I figured I would write the part, shoot the film with a few friends, and move on to the next project. I quickly learned that moviemaking doesn't always work on the timeline you are expecting.
Along the way the script met with successes, victories in script competitions, films festivals and the like. Each time the film met with success it seemed that people in the industry wanted the film but didn't want me in the lead part. I kept fighting for the role. For years the film didn't happen. But I kept working and as I waited, I continued to write other screenplays. But I still never thought of myself as a writer. It was just a way for me to express myself when I wasn't acting.
Fast forward to today, the year 2014. Nearly ten years later and I'm still at it. The same project...
Recently, an Oscar-nominated producer came on board the team. She has worked with some of the biggest names in Hollywood, including Quentin Tarantino. She brought the film to a great agency and was pitching the project with me in the lead role. I thought I was going to get everything I had been fighting for after all these years. Then life kicked in a way that I could take a sign or a challenge - the agency loved the script, wants to put some big names on board but with that they wanted my resignation from playing the lead role.
I was crushed.
But with that initial disappointment came the silver lining. I would remain on the project as a producer and writer. My film would be given the chance to release bigger than I could have ever imagined. I'd give myself the opportunity to be what I never imagined myself to be when I started this whole process - a produced writer in Hollywood.
I thought long and hard. I figured life had taken me to this point over and over again for a reason. And I realized that it was up to me that reason a good one. Because for whatever reason, life was telling me (over and over again) that the film would be better served without me in that part. And after everything, I found that I did in fact love to write. So I made the decision to adjust and change. Finally, after nearly ten years, I let go of the part...
And you know what? Once I finally did, I felt better.